This Thanksgiving Holiday is so often fraught with conflict, pressure and stress. The burden placed on the already laden shoulders of the matriarchs, this burden yet another symbol of the patriarchal dominance idolized by our society. The origins of this holiday told as a story of love, generosity and community in order to whitewash and cover up the atrocities committed by white colonialism, by my ancestors. The food worship just one more example of our pornographic obsession with consumption and gluttony.
As a child, this holiday could be the delightful smell of buttery potatoes and the pleasure of being with the adults that I loved and craved, it is also the anniversary of my mother's first trip to America, adding to the sense of hope and possibility that occasionally showed up around this time of year.
​As I learned a well rounded history (thank you Philadelphia Public School) I understood better the horrifying historical implications of this holiday and soon it wasn't just the food worship that repulsed me, but also the betrayal  that this holiday was founded on. I spent many of my tween and teen years attempting to rebel by sulking in my room, or at the table scowling through my consumption of delicious food prepared with love by my Aunt. Eventually addiction took over my life and most of my choices were taken away, including having the luxury of contemplating the moral ambiguity of this holiday. My entire purpose was now bent on avoiding myself by whatever means necessary; all of my decisions and actions were motivated by this end.
A little over 18 years ago I was brought into utter desperation and was able to surrender, giving up the fight against myself and turning towards recovery. At 30 years old I restarted the process of growing up, slowly regaining the power to make choices and decisions based on my own morals and values.
This Thanksgiving Holiday still stirs up conflict in me: guilt, rage and defeat mixes with love and hope and determination. This mix is the beautiful, complex tapestry of my life fully lived. I am grateful to be able to choose what I do with this day, this life and how I celebrate (or don't) this Holiday. I choose to take this opportunity to gather together the people that I love in celebration of OUR LOVE and OUR community. The ideals of this holiday may have been promoted over a foundation of lies and betrayal, however the ideals are real to me and put into action of truth by my own demonstrations of generosity and love.

My body is the home of my spirit, this is what is meant by TEMPLE. Just as the church, Mosque, & Shrine are sacred spaces that hold and symbolize the energy of the Divine, the source of our creation, so my body is a physical space that contains an energy that is limitless. The spirit is in my body, but not of my body. This unseeable, immeasurable spirit is my connection to the Oneness, the Oneness that is everything and nothing.
Trauma and addiction necessarily disconnected me from by body's wisdom, severing the communication between spirit, mind, heart and reality. The journey back into my body has been and continues to be integral to my mental and spiritual health. Moving with my breath activates and strengthens my parasympathetic nervous system (the branch of the autonomic nervous system often referred to as "rest and digest".
Slow, undulating Yoga (if you've ever taken a class with me, you've experienced this coordinated movement) combined with the effort of coordinating my breath to movement built my somatic awareness (somatic:relating to the body) and retaught my relaxation response (rest & digest) how to work. Over time with regular practice, I have fortified my inherent resilience and strengthened my ability to come into a peaceful state of being by connecting to my present experience in my body.
My breath is the most powerful tool I have to positively affect my overall wellbeing, both through movement and stillness. This is experience reinforces my assertion that each one of us has what we need inside of us to realize our fullest potential and fully inhabit our lives. The path to our best reality is laid out in our own consciousness, we just need a lighthouse to guide us there. This is the inspiration for the name of my practice and for the services offered. I am honored and humbled each time I serve as lighthouse, illumination what is already there, for the spirit that shines through me, is the same light that shines through you.